Everyone messes up, But here’s how to say sorry effectively

By , K24 Digital
On Tue, 31 Oct, 2023 01:50 | < 1 min read
Photo used for illustration. PHOTO/Pexels
Photo used for illustration. PHOTO/Pexels

It is not always easy to say sorry. But, if you have hurt your significant other, you may want to patch things up. The best way to do this is to do it sincerely.

First, acknowledge your mistake. Let your dear one know that you understand what you did (or didn’t do) and how it hurt them. Don’t say, “I am sorry if I hurt you…’ or I am sorry but …’, This will sound more like a justification than a sincere apology. Say, ‘I am sorry that I hurt you when I…’

Ask your partner for forgiveness after acknowledging your ‘crime’. This puts the ball in their court, as they now have to decide what to do with your repentance and your request for forgiveness.

Apologising doesn’t mean that you are weak, or that you have lost, and your spouse has won. A sincere apology is about fixing the relationship and showing your partner you care more about them than you care about your ego.

Avoid placing blame on your spouse. Don’t says something like, “I am sorry I hurt your feelings by cheating on you. But I did it because you never/always ….” Apologising like this means you have not taken responsibility for your actions.

When this happens, the apology sessions may quickly escalate into another disagreement concerning the issue you are blaming your partner for.

If you would also like your partner to change something that they do that hurts you, schedule another session where you can both address this issue in a loving manner.

Depending on the seriousness of the issue, be prepared to apologise more than once, in order to rebuild trust. Tell your partner how you will change your ways to avoid hurting them again.

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